REVIEW

AT 12,27; "SOTCHI ADVANCED DOWNHILL TEA TRAY SIMULATOR"

Reviewer: CGCSport
Developer: absinthe_boy
Genre: Winter Sports
Platform: Spectrum 48K
Language: BASIC

Myke: Welcome back, race-fans, here we are in Sochi and about to witness the first new event of the year; The Downhill Tea Tray.

Dave: Eh? Tea Tray? Are you, er, sure?

Myke: Yes indeed, one person per tea tray; "hurtling downhill headfirst on a polished tea tray at unimaginable speeds to either death or medal glory" according to the press brief.

Dave: Cripes! Rather them, than, er, me!

Myke: Each Olympian starts by selecting their Tea Tray of choice.

Dave: Am I right in saying that it, er, doesn't make a blind bit of, er, difference?

Myke: None at all! There's also been some confusion about the competitor selection process leading to - and I'm quoting here - "Variable not found" errors?

Dave: ... Um... No, er, clue I'm afraid.

Myke: Well, whatever it means, I guess we have to expect some teething issues the first time around.

Dave: How's your, er, display screen? I can barely see the, er, competitor on mine?

Myke: No, your screen is fine, but apparently Fritz really thought that wearing green against that crystal blue snow was a good idea!

Dave: Can't he see where he's, er, going? He keeps crashing on the first, er, bend?

Myke: Fritz' regular event is skiing but, with that Horace chap hogging the slopes and a relatively low showing for this event, he's decided to have a go.

Dave: Perhaps someone should have, er, given him some pointers on how to control that tea tray?

Myke: It's relatively easy once you get the hang of it; lean left (5) to move left, right (8) to move right and try to avoid hitting anything. Hang on... I'll be back in a sec...

Time passes...

Dave: Oh. Looks like he's changed his, er, outfit (Line 780 - Ed) and is having another go?

Myke: YES! He's made it past the first bend.

Dave: What does this, er, "scroll?" on my display mean?

Myke: Never mind that... Just hit the any key... Wow... This guy's doing really well...

Dave: OOOOOOOOFFF! EVEN I FELT THAT!!

Myke: Yikes. Spoke too soon. He'll definitely need some stitches but I have to say, for a beginner, 5850 is a cracking score!

The Xtra Crap Factor

Apparently this game was developed using the EightyOne emulator and then tested it on a real 48K "for authenticity."

Unfortunately I don't have any working ZX machines and so have been unable to test any of this year's entries in such a manner, however, such additional effort and attention to detail isn't appropriate for the competition anyway so I'm subtracting a Crap Factor point from absinthe_boy for trying too hard.

Luckily he's left the .SNA file in a state where you have to RUN the program manually - which is a classic CSSCGC move - and so he reclaims the point immediately.

Nice one, absinthe_boy!

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